Fist of Fury

Ugh. German class begins again tomorrow. Different school, different set-up. Same sad, sad story.

I just got back from taking my 1 hour "placement test" for the course I've signed up for tomorrow. It was one hour where I was handed what John calls "The Wu-Tang Clan Fist of Fury." There were verb tenses, prepositional phrases, and loooong strings of sentences to which I never remember being exposed. On the second--yes second question--I started trying to remember tricks from college about how often "C" is the right answer in multiple choice questions. Oh, and it was timed! Fifteen minutes for 77 questions and 20 minutes to answer what my vacation was like in German. My written response looked something like this: "Last May (chosen b/c I couldn't remember how to spell October), I drove to Dresden with my Friend. We drove my car. When we got to the hotel, we went to see our room. In Dresden, we saw many churches (or did I say "cherries"? I'm not sure). They were pretty. Dresden was very nice. I liked it." Brillant. A linguist in the making.

Now, I will admit to be a perpetually lazy student. Not just in German but basically in all areas of academia. I enjoy class (well, occassionally) because I feel like I'm making an effort to learn by just showing up. But when it comes to studying or exerting some self-propelled effort I am sorely lacking. I never studied for the GRE b/c I didn't want to sacrifice my "free time." That's why I never went to get a Masters. And I basically switched majors my Junior year of college because studying every night for, you name it--Chemistry, Biology, Statistics--was not idea of what university was all about. I mean, I am a well rounded person, I can not be caged. Oh, and I also have a test phobia so I always assume that no matter how well I know a subject I will fail it. A good way to approach tests. Don't you think?

When the teacher started grading the test, I looked away. It panics me to see my personage evaluated on paper. Really, sir, I'm not as dumb as I seem. Just tell me I failed and send me to remedial German. I can take it.

So, tomorrow classes begin and I find out whether I'm in a class with the people who've never been exposed to German or with the ones with learning disabilities, like me. Should be fun. Five hours a day of non-stop Deutsch for five days a week for a month. I'm really looking forward to it. Wish me luck!

Wishing You Were Here

I had the strangest dream last week. I dreamt I was driving to Stonecrest Mall on the way to J's mom's house when I had to make a critical decision: Taco Bell or Dairy Queen. I couldn't decide what was more compelling a cheap, flimsy, beef soft taco or a chili dog and Butterfinger Blizzard. What is weird is that I can't tell you the last time I had either one of these items, let alone the last time I stepped foot into Taco Hell. Ever since last week, however, I would give anything to be back in the states long enough to go.

It is torture to have a craving for something and to know that there is no way on earth to satisfy that craving. It's like the more you want it, the more you think about it, the more you want it. It's even worse when you get real-time American television that advertises said food craving on an hourly commercial roll. I tried to quench the Tex-Mex grumblings by sneaking into a VERY shady restaurant in my neighborhood (think: sandy beach-like floors, cheap teaky tables, somberos, and signs advertizing Jagermeister Fridays) to order an "enchilada." Other than the fact that I received beef wrapped inside of a soft taco, nothing has ever tasted further away from an enchilada than this. Something inside me knew this but I had to give it a try. Sigh.

So, what do you do to exorcize the food demons? Why, you blog about them in a list dump. Here are the foods I would die for right now.

1. Cupcake, any cupcake, from Whole Foods.
2. Pumpkin chocolate chip cookie from Whole Foods.
3. A beef soft taco and enchilada with refried beans and rice...oh, and queso dip with jalapeno peppers
4. Butterfinger Blizzard
5. French fries from Steak and Shake
6. Chili Dog with Orange Julius Milk Shake from the Varsity
7. Everything bagel with cream cheese from a local bakery

Mmmm. My mouth is watering just thinking about it....wishing you were here.

Fun with Adverts

I came across the link below to this great Dutch clothing site called HEMA on Snooker's blog.

It's just a bit of fun to help you procrastinate on finishing that memo you've been putting off at work for the last week. I mean, the last thing you feel like doing at work is working, right?

Just make sure you turn up your volume and close your office door. It gets progressively louder as the video continues. Plus you don't want any of your nosey office mates to think you're doing anything more than a bit of product research--which is what you are doing--assuming you work in IT in the graphics department and have been asked to create a site that attracts more customers to your home page, one where customers can't actually buy anything. Riiiight. Well, you probably don't need an excuse anyway, do you? Besides, you wouldn't be on this blog now unless you were really desperate for some internet drivel to distract you from working.

Just click and wait for the fun to ensue. http://producten.hema.nl/

A Matter of Taste

This is what I've been eating for breakfast this week. It is bircher mueslix--a yogurty, oatmeal cereal that is mixed with fruit, usually apples and pears.

I discovered my taste for mueslix just last week when a friend introduced me to it at the gym. I thought I knew what mueslix was--just another type of granola cereal--but this is quite different. Substantial in a healthy way and it guarantees that you won't need to eat another bite until after lunchtime.

It's quite easy to make. Some raw oats soaked overnight in juice, spices, and yogurt that is then mixed with natural or flavored yogurt the next morning to loosen it up. Traditionalists put grated apple, orange, or pear in as well, but I prefer berries. I feel very German eating it. Like somehow, I've become more native. More in touch with my Swiss-German compatriotes.

I've found a lot of comfort finding foods here that I like just as much if not better than I did in the States. I've always appreciated good pork but you just can't beat the variety and flavors of the good 'ol pig you can get here. You could eat a different type of bread, pastry, or cake here every day for a year and still not taste all of the amazing variations of homemade love that German bakers proudly prepare. And that's not to mention the beer, tea, and diversity of root veg that you can buy by the truck load in this country.

There is one taste, however, that I have not been able to appreciate and that is the parsnip. I don't think I'd ever had a parsnip before moving to here but as mentioned above, if you don't embrace the root vegetable you will be going hungry for fresh veggies during the winters, my friend. I had it a few weeks back so I knew that I didn't like parsnips. But I keep forgetting what the dag-on word means in the German so I keep on ordering the horrid flavored soup from our local take-out restaurant. So, sadly, I had it again tonight for dinner and as always, I had to convince myself throughout the "meal" that "No, I was not going to throw up this soup. (Hiccup) That I secretely liked parsnips and that they were good for me. That the smell, that awful, dirty sock smell (hiccup), was just the nutrients derived from the healthy root of the Gods. Yumm." When I finally swallowed my last mealy-parsnipity mouthful, I breathed a sigh of relief. Mind over matter and all of that.

So I'm not writing off all "exotic" root vegetables in Germany and I will definitely continue to venture into the unknown spheres of the German culinary universe. But, believe you me, the parsnip is one food that will not knowingly find it's way into this expat any time soon. I just don't have enough pep in me. (Hiccup)

In Like a Lion

The weather has been the pits lately. After having a few unseasonably nice days in the latter part of February, I had every hope that March would follow suit. Maybe we'd even be lucky enough to have more sunny days than gray ones? Nope. No such luck.

The scene on the left is what I woke to Wednesday morning.

Last weekend, there was a typhoon off the coast of Germany that created very heavy winds, torrential downpours, and were even the cause of a few deaths. Who knew that typhoons even touched down in Germany? I thought once I moved to Europe that I'd left the scary weather behind. Flash floods. Tornadoes. Severe thunder and lightening. I guess I can add damaging winds now to that list.

So after seeing the snow falling on Wednesday, I thought to myself. Wow. I guess we're in for a bit of a storm....that was until I grabbed something to eat for breakfast and came back to check on the progress an hour and a half later. I kid you not that the snow had stopped falling, was starting to melt and the sky was blue and shining.

What, Mother Nature said, you weren't actually expecting some consistency from me, were you?